As the rest of the world settle down in front of a roaring fire and attempt to defrost their fingers with hot chocolate, I am hibernating in air con considering how ironic those icicle fairy lights & snow man decorations are. I mean, I can’t even keep the ice cubes in my Coke Zero frozen!
Ok, Australian readers: you can stop laughing at me now! Having grown up in the coldest, greyest corner of England, the concept of a ‘hot Christmas’ is always something that will baffle me.
1. The Weather
Oh look at me being as British as Queen Lizzie herself and whining on about the weather. By any Western definition of the holiday, Christmas is a Winter-y, icy, snow-y time.
Here down under, its 30 degrees, the sun is blaring and the beach is calling my name. My parents are currently over here for their first Australian Christmas and they are finding the idea of a Summer Christmas ridiculously hard to grasp. And nope, it doesn’t get any less confusing on your fourth Christmas here…
Jake and I always bicker about whose ‘version’ of Christmas is closer to the real deal. He always wins the argument when he says that Jesus was born in a desert. He’s got a point…
2. The Irony
Blow up snowmen, snowflake fairy lights, polar bears and penguins are plastered all over the houses, shops and restaurants. **Insert huge question mark here**
Dear Australia, those snowmen would melt, those polar bears would get sunburn and every single snowflake would cease to even form in your oven-like atmosphere.
3. The Gift Problem
Although the Christmas traditions are pretty much a carbon copy of those in the UK, the Summer issue causes one huge kaboodle: what on earth do you buy for gifts?!
I’ve obviously spent too much of my life relying on hot chocolate sets, jumpers and socks as my go-to Christmas gifts.
4. The Time Difference
Ok, I have to admit that this one will not be as bad this year, as my parents are actually in Australia. However, the fact that we are ten hours ahead of the UK makes for some pretty dodgy and often downright embarrassing family Skype conversations.
Cue me after many glasses of wine at 10 PM calling my poor parents who have just started cooking their Christmas dinner…
5. The Dinner
The best thing about being a total pig on Christmas is that the cold weather makes you feel like you are allowed to go on a ‘pre-hibernation’ rampage.
Here, there is the problem that you will probably be wearing a bikini the next day. Add the fact that hot weather is an appetite repressive and it becomes really freaking weird.
Despite my oh-so-British rant, Christmas in Australia will always be wonderful in its own way. After all, there are those beach BBQ’s, boxing-day swim sessions and the fact that you can still wear Summer clothes!
Have a wonderful Christmas wherever in the world you may be! Thank you so much for your support throughout the year. May all your wishes come true for the new year, wishing you love and happiness always,